lunamoonlight I like it, you used really good detail. I recommend a little more dialogue, but its fine for just this bit, it was not exactly e

lunamoonlight It was not exactly needed. You do good for sensory details as

lunamoonlight Well, and that is something i personally struggle with*

cactuspot12 Ty!

cactuspot12 Ik I defiantly don’t use enough dialogue in my writing so I will try to include more if I edit and revise it

Twentyonepilotsan The second I saw dead dog I read for two seconds then stopped

lunamoonlight A'ight. If you ever need, i can colab a bit and help you with dialogue. Dialogue comes naturally for me as long as i have a good sense of who the characters are and how the conversation should go. Sensory details are harder, i dont always think of how something smells or tastes or sounds like. Touch and sight are fine

cactuspot12 @lunamoonlight after school ends for me I am planning on editing this or writing a plot for a couple other stories. Editing this is main priority tho

cactuspot12 Message me if u got ideas

HeyitsBabyKiki That’s cool and no

cactuspot12 Thx

CSeriestechhero I used to play violin... I now play the keyboard or use a drumpad machine

lunamoonlight Cool,i know some clairinet, some piano, some guitar and how to sing where my family says im tonedeaf but my class says im great.

cactuspot12 @CSeriestechhero I am also learning violin for school as well

Twentyonepilotsan I play trombone!

cactuspot12 Trumpet and trombone players have classes together, so the other kid plays trombone

CSeriestechhero wowee cactus

FortnitePlayer I. Used to play it